On studying and good grades

Another busy few weeks just flew by. Some things happened, probably the most significant of which was my boy Gareth smashing his right elbow against the bedframe when he tripped over the mattress on the floor, resulting in a horrible fracture that required surgery to fix. Now his right arm is in a cast, with a few steel wires inside holding the pieces together. He'll need another minor operation to remove the wires in a few months, and he'll have his cast removed in 10 days or so, but thank God the worst is over. Hopefully there'll be no long term issues with his elbow's growth. We're optimistic about that. Not so much about him not doing this again.

But today I want to just talk about something else. Recently, the PSLE results came out, and although the overall pass rate in the country is apparently the highest it has been, it is a sensitive period because of a recent suicide case involving an 11-year-old, thought to be because of high expectations put upon him on his studies. So it seems there are a lot of messages going out that poor grades are not the end of the world, that you are not defined by your results, etc. Anyone who dares to show unhappiness with his or her child receiving poor grades is subject to the righteous wrath of social media and its anonymous legion of netizens. Recently, a parent was heavily criticized for being upset with her son not getting the PSLE score to her expectation, and therefore she was not going to give him a Nintendo set. This drew vitriol and criticism on the internet, with some offering to get the poor child a Nintendo. The mother came out to clarify some points subsequently, which were not reported correctly, such as the score she had expected, and the fact that her son already had a Nintendo, and she had taken it away because he had not kept to the time limit set by her, and because he was perceived to not have put in his best effort in the exam, he was not getting it back.

Saw on my Facebook newsfeed quite a number of videos where people who did not do well in their studies were shown to be successful and happy in life. There would be taglines at the end like "You don't have to be a doctor to be happy/successful".

All these have made me want to say something about the issue. Speaking from a parent's point of view, I think the important point has been missed. I don't think it's right to tell a child, "It's okay if you don't do well in your studies, see all these successful people? They didn't do well when they were young too, and look where they are now." What I mean is, that should not be the only message, which is what all the videos I see seem to be saying. For me, the most important thing has always been the attitude towards doing something that is important for the stage in their lives. For my school-going children, that would be their studies, but it also applies to other things that they do. They must have the right attitude to work hard and persevere even if they don't feel like it. It's just a lot more prominent in their studies, because that takes up the most time in their lives.

I'm not going to tell Chloe at the start, "Hey, it's okay if you don't do well, grades are not everything, you don't need them to be successful." You know why? Because that statement does not say what is required to be successful. For me, that would be the right attitude, the right values, to be willing to work hard and honest for something, and to endure to the end. I would tell her to work hard in her studies, to do her very best. I would tell her that I would expect her not to slack off in her studies, and to put in her best effort. But I also always tell her, no matter what, I will always love her, whether she worked hard and did badly, or even if she was lazy and did badly, nothing would change my love for her, I would always be here for her. But there will be a difference in how I will react between the above 2 scenarios. If she has shown that she has put in the best she can, and does her work properly and seriously, even if she scored below expectations, I will still be okay with that, and won't be harsh to her. But, if she just refuses to take her work seriously, and just finishes her homework quickly so that she can play, and her grades reflect that, I will of course not just hug her and say, "It's okay, grades are not everything, now go and play." I will let it be known to her that her effort was not satisfactory and she had better buck up and show a better attitude in her studies. Of course, as said before, I will always make sure she knows my love for her is not dependent on her grades or even her attitude and behaviour.

The thing is, if not pushed, most children are not going to naturally work hard in their studies. It takes effort to learn, and the amount of stuff they have to learn is a lot, that's true. The pressure is high, but whether the education system is right or not is another argument for another day. What I'm trying to say is, no matter the pressure, my children must show me they are willing to work hard in their schoolwork, because that's a very good way to teach them the values of dilligence and perseverence, which are vital traits to succeeding in anything they may embark on in the future. If it is such that they do not have the aptitude to score excellent grades, so be it. Truly, I will not begrudge them, but will be happy that they have been equipped with the skills and character for them to go through life.

Of course, for those with an exceptional skill, for example in a certain sport, or in art, or whatever, by all means pursue that, but the same principle applies right? You would want them to have the right attitude in learning that certain skill, or honing their talents in a certain area. Nobody is going to succeed on raw talent alone. It takes a lot, a lot of hard work to reach the pinnacle, and really, if you don't put in hard work, but still reach a certain level because of raw talent, it is really still a waste of the talent given to you. And passion for something can only go so far. At some point, when you work really hard in something, it's going to be tedious and painful, and the temptation to give up will be there.

It is a competitive society out there, and I want to make sure my children develop the right attitude and character to be able to compete with others. If they don't have what it takes to achieve traditional academic success, no matter. As long as they have the right mentality, whatever they undertake, they will not go far wrong.

In the few success stories highlighted in the videos I mentioned, two important points were completely left out. One, those who succeeded in life put in a lot of effort to achieve the success they achieved, albeit not in academic studies, but in their specific areas, such as art, literature, entrepreneurship, etc. Two, for every person who did not do well in their studies early on and went on to achieve success, there are probably many, many, who fell away, and did not reach their full potential, because they chose not to develop the right attitude.

For me, studying for exams and getting good grades is not the most important thing. It is being willing to work hard to get the good grades. Studying for exams is a means for me to train the right attitudes and character in my children at this stage in their lives. I make it a point to always remind myself of that.

The new PSLE system

Okay, I mentioned that I want to discuss the new PSLE system being rolled out from 2021 onwards.

PSLE, as us Singaporeans know, stands for Primary School Leaving Examination. It is the first milestone examination that children here have to take, at the age of twelve years. The score you get determines the secondary school you can enrol into. The higher the score, the better chance you have of getting the school you want, especially if it is a "top" school. The current system is that each child's PSLE score is measured relative to his/her other peers, not based on his/her absolute results. For eg, let's say I take the PSLE, and I got 90 marks for Maths. Wow, great, right? Except, suppose the Maths paper was particularly easy that year, or my fellow twelve-year-olds were working that much harder, and the mean score was 92. That would mean my score of 90 was below average, and it would contribute to a lower than expected overall PSLE score.

So, this means you are not actually fighting to achieve a certain score and then you'd be okay. It's about hoping that you outscore your peers. If the majority of them score higher than you, it doesn't matter if your absolute scores are high, you are still going to get a low PSLE score. This has led to complaints that PSLE is too competitive, and puts too much stress on our children. And you have reports of highly rated tutors making large amounts of money opening tuition schools that charge premium rates.

Hence the new system. In this new system, you will be judged based on your scores, not relative to how your peers do. There will be 8 Achievement Levels(AL) for each subject, with 1 being the best, and 8 being the worst. Each level has a score band. The ALs are added up for all 4 subjects, with the best score achievable is AL 4. This is similar to the O level system.

So now, as long as you manage to achieve the score needed, you get the matching AL. And since there are bands now, it is not as finely differentiated as the old system, where just 1 point may mean the difference between getting into the secondary school of your choice or missing out. So it's supposed to make it less competitive.

Well, I would imagine that many scholarly brains must have looked into this, and must have worked out with reasonable logic that this will help relieve pressure for the students. But as a lay person, looking at this simply, I do have a few concerns, and indeed, doubts that our children will feel any less stress with this new system.

1. No more "hiding" of weaker subjects

Previously, it used to be, if you were weaker in one subject, you could kind of mask it by being good in the other 3, because the final score that matters is the total aggregate score. You were still given individual grades for each subject, but those grades are not taken into account when deciding if you could get into the secondary school of your choice. For eg, student X who had 4 A stars in his subject could still get a lower aggregate score than student Y who only had 3 A stars and one A, but his A stars were higher scores than those of student X. Although student X had 4 A stars, it is student Y who will have the advantage in choosing a school of his choice, because of his higher aggregate scores.

Now, there is no more hiding. Each subject carries an AL point, and if you are particularly weak in one subject, even if you are very strong in the other 3, that weak subject will still pull your overall AL score down(or up, as it were). So can you imagine what's going to happen? Parents are going to ensure that their children are well trained in every subject, so a child who's particularly weak in, say, English, is going to find himself or herself being subject to intensive tuition and training in that particular area, because hey, you don't want that weakness to ruin his AL score, right?

2. Unfairness of balloting

In the end, it is still a zero end sum. There's still a fixed quota of students that the so-called elite schools can take in. Those who advocate the new system say that now you don't need to wonder how you did compared to your peers. As long as you achieve a certain score, and hence a certain AL point aggregate, you should be able to enter the secondary school matching your standard. But what if some schools are over-subscribed, as would be expected with the top schools? Well, then there would be a certain criteria by which some students are chosen ahead of others. Singaporean students get priority over foreign students, and then if there are still too many students, balloting will be done.

One of the main reasons why many are opposed to the current system, is that it is unfair, they say. Just one point difference and my child can miss out, they say. But with this new system, it may well boil down to the luck of the draw. How is this any fairer? In fact, I would argue that the current system is very fair. True, missing out by one point may be harsh, but ultimately, the score your child got is the one he achieved in the exam, and if he does miss out by one point, well, tough, but the other child who made it did score higher in the same exam. To then subject that child who scored one point higher to a ballot with others who scored lower, now, that is unfair.

3. Likely increase in difficulty of exams

Picture this. Now the target to reach is an AL score of 4 points for all the 4 subjects combined. And this can now be achieved by reaching a certain score for each of the subjects. What do you think parents will do? My guess is they will force their children to study hard to reach the level needed to achieve the 4 points. It is therefore likely that with each passing year, more and more people will be able to reach the 4 point target, and since it is no longer a bell curve, there is no limit to how many students can get 4 points. If 100% of the cohort scores high enough, they all can get 4 points, theoretically. Of course, that is near impossible, but it is not difficult to see that the percentage of those achieving these giddy heights is likely to increase each year, as parents and students learn how to beat the system through sheer brute force and hard work. That in itself will create more burden on the students, but those setting the exam can't have too many getting top scores right? There will be too much balloting otherwise. So what can they do? The only way is to make the exam harder, to trim off the excess and keep the percentage getting 4 points at a stable level. This will again put more stress and pressure on the students.

I guess, in the end, only time will tell if this system will make it less competitive for our children, but my feeling is that it won't, because it still comes down to the same thing: everyone is fighting each other for the same limited number of places in the schools, especially the top ones. I'm all for reducing stress on our children, but if the choice is only between the current system and the upcoming one, I must say that the current one is still fairer, because it is an honest fight with your peers to see who comes out on top. Not everyone can make it to the top school, but it need not be the standard by which everyone is measured. I think emphasis needs to be placed on developing the unique skills and talents of each individual, especially those who may not be so academically inclined. It is easier said than done of course, but a key component must be the educating of parents, that the academic paper chase is not, and cannot be, the be all and end all in their child's education, and that ultimately, the goal is to identify what the child is good at, and passionate about, and develop that aspect so that that becomes the craft by which the child will make a living out of. And be happier doing it. However, there must be the correct infrastructure in place to support this as well.

Chloe will still be taking the old PSLE system, but Gareth will be the "pioneer" batch of the new system, and of course the rest of my children will be under the new system.

It's been a month??

Just checking in today to assure that I'm still active on this blog. It's been a blurrily busy month again, and the coming month is going to get busier still. And naive old me thought after passing my exam, I was going to have more time on my hands.

Been wanting to discuss a few things recently, one of which is the new PSLE system which will come into effect in 2021, exactly when Gareth(my second child) will be taking the exam. Have some thoughts on that, but I'll do it in another post.

Zika exploded onto the local scene about a week ago, and new cases have been added everyday. It's been quite busy for us at the frontline, in the polyclinic, as the workflow and protocols change literally everyday. I think it's going to be very difficult to eradicate Zika. If we could, we would have eradicated dengue long ago. Thankfully the illness is usually mild and self-limiting, but the main worry is the microcephaly in fetuses in infected pregnant women that seems to be associated with the virus.

As I mentioned, going to be quite busy for the next few weeks, need to get some projects and presentations done, but will still try to come in here, and more frequently.

Pokemon here, Pokemon there, Pokemon Go everywhere

Yesterday was the day Pokemon Go launched in Singapore. Prior to this, there was so much news, hype and controversy about this mobile phone game app, most people would have heard about this game way before yesterday, myself included. I was never a Pokemon fan myself, being a bit over-aged when the whole cartoon series became popular.I never played any Pokemon game as far as I can remember. I don't even know the theme song.

But you know what they say about how there is no such thing as bad publicity. Over the past weeks, there were reports of how the game has made "zombies" of so many people, resulting in many accidents and incidents, most of which were negative in nature. This has led to a growing voice condemning the game and its players, and calling for a ban on it. But this must have piqued many people's interest, people who would otherwise not have been bothered to try out this game. People like myself. I must admit, the curiosity got the better of me, and I downloaded the game as soon as I found out it was available in Singapore.

My own opinion of the game: it's pretty interesting. I can see why people would be addicted to playing it, especially those who have been fans of Pokemon. From what I gather, the finding of these Pokemon characters  in real life like this, and being able to capture them in the "live surroundings" setting that the game provides, is kind of a fantasy dream come true for Pokemon fans, because that's what happens in the cartoons. Furthermore, these "collecting" kind of games always has a certain appeal in its challenge to...ah...how we say...."catch 'em all".

But it's not the soul-sucking, brains-devouring, demonic, evil game that some people have seemed to portray it to be, at least not to me. Sure, it's quite addictive, but hey, there're so many addictive things in the whole. There are so many addictive games in the world. All the successful video games are successful because they are addictive. It's not the game itself that is bad. It's the poor self-control exhibited by some people that is damaging. In a game like Pokemon Go, where you have to walk around while monitoring your phone's screen, it is particularly obvious to spot someone playing the game, and there is more potential for accidents to happen. But let's be clear, it is the player who is to take the main blame for the accident.

A couple of weeks ago, I saw in my FB newsfeed a shared video about how a girl in another country was hit by a vehicle while crossing the highway to catch a pokemon on the game. Thankfully, she survived, but when interviewed, instead of being sorry for her behaviour, she, as well as her mother, put the blame on the game, saying if not for the game, she would not have had the accident. That's a really sad thing to see, that we live in an age where self-responsibility is in scant supply. Saying that about the game is akin to saying, "Well, you know, I stole the jewellery from the shop, but it's not my fault, the shopkeeper should not have put such a beautiful piece of jewellery on display in his shop, it's his fault."

So just today, I have seen a lot of FB posts on Pokemon Go. A lot were just innocent pics of the pokemon characters caught, but there were a couple of posts which talked about how "zombies" are now appearing in Singapore, people walking absently on the road, almost getting into accidents, or how the poster would try and identify the people playing the game and laugh at them. Ah, come on, it almost seems like they need to make fun of these people and show how silly they are to feel good about themselves. I've been out myself today, and on the road, and I have not encountered a single dangerous incident or accident involving a person playing Pokemon Go. Sure, there are many people playing the game, and it's quite obvious, from how they walk around looking at their phones, but they seem to be enjoying themselves, they're behaving harmlessly and not being a nuisance, and a lot of them are in groups or couples, like a social kind of thing.

And look at the benefits. People are actually walking more because of the game, and that's got to be good. Exercise is good right? Why put down this form of exercise just because it's derived from a game that you might feel is silly? The body will still benefit.

And people are discovering more landmarks and places around them. See, this game has many "pokestops", which are kind of like petrol stations where you stock up on the poke balls to catch the pokemons with, and you may get some other goodies as well, and "gyms", where you can train or "fight" with other players, which are located in actual places, often certain landmarks or buildings that have some meaning. It's actually quite educational.(man, I can almost hear the smirk)

I guess what I'm trying to say is, Pokemon Go is a game, quite an interesting and fun one, in fact, to a lot of people. We should all try to exert some self-control, and take some responsibility when playing the game, to ensure we don't endanger ourselves or others around us, and of course to not become obsessed with it, but at the end of the day, it is a game. If you don't like it, don't play it. No need to make fun of those who do. You may say walking around trying to catch virtual monsters is stupid and dangerous, but hey, so is inhaling a whole bunch of toxic, poisonous fumes into your lungs, and breathing the same gases out to harm those around you, or drinking stuff that damage your liver and cause cancer. Maybe let's ban those first.

After so long....

Okay, I'm back! After a few months of silence, I am writing on this blog again, and I plan to do so regularly now. The reason for the hiatus was that things got really busy with the baby, and my preparation for an exam in July this year. I did not specifically introduce my line of work in previous posts(what can I say? I like to inject some mystery in my persona), so I'll just say it now. I'm a doctor, specialising in Family Medicine, and working in public healthcare, and I just completed the fellowship exam for Family Medicine a week ago. This was a re-take, as I failed last year, but I made it this time, and I'm really thankful and relieved that I did so. It really was through the grace of God that I passed. I was so pre-occupied with the exam, and I just could not bring myself to put effort in other things. Now I can finally turn my attention to other stuff(like my well-read blog).

It doesn't feel right to write on any specific topic in this post, since this is kind of like a "Hello, I'm back and still alive, and I promise to write more regularly from now on!" post. Just want to update that our baby(Charlotte) is doing well, and we are all learning to grow as a family, with its joy and inherent struggles, especially with kids at different stages of childhood. Will share more in subsequent posts.

Will keep this short, but do expect to see me write regularly from now on.

The first 3 weeks

Almost 3 weeks since the birth of Charlotte. Time for a quick update.

We always knew the arrival of a newborn would take up a lot of time, and bring a bit of stress as well. I think, given the circumstances, we have dealt with these first 3 weeks fairly alright. We focused on the big things, did not fuss too much about the little things, and everyone's still alive at the end of the day. Which is always a good thing.

The biggest obstacle this time round, I feel, is the presence of a two-year-old, who has suddenly lost his status as the youngest - and therefore, by default, the most pampered - member of the family. Seeing everyone giving all the attention to the baby must not have been easy for Gideon. He can't even be with his beloved mummy whom he had been previously given unrestricted access to all this time. Instead, mummy is always with this little bundle of noisy cries and smelly diapers, and does not let him near them most of the time. Who does this little baby think she is??

Add to that, the fact that he's at this phase of his life where he's challenging everything, demanding everything, testing his boundaries, saying "No!" to all requests. Yes folks, the urban legend called "The Terrible Twos" is not a myth, it's real, and "terrible" is probably an understatement. Well, I guess it's not the same for all kids. When Gareth was 2, the display of impetuousness and rebellion wasn't as bad(or maybe I just have a bad memory). But Gideon is truly a handful, and easily the biggest headache for us during this period.

But we do manage the best we can, we try to give him whatever time we can have for him, especially myself. He still is closer to his mummy though, and cries inconsolably at night sometimes when he wakes up demanding for my wife to comfort him. When I try to be the one to do so, he cries even harder, the little brat. It's all good, it's all good, I'm not upset, I'm not jealous. I know it's just a phase, he can't quite control his feelings(wait till he finds out who gives him pocket money, the little....)

I'm on leave during this period, to help out my wife, be that extra pair of hands, and I am also hoping to catch up on my assignments for my fellowship exam retake later this year. It's chugging along slowly, too slow if I'm honest, but I try to look on the bright side of things. I've got other things in my life that are more important. My family has got to come first, and even if I don't make it again this year in my exam, so be it. It's not exactly the best of times for me to be dealing with the exam at this stage in my life. I guess it's no excuse in the eyes of others, but hey, it's my family's opinions that matter, and I just want to be there for them as much as I can.

That's why one entire afternoon was spent taking them out to see Kung Fu Panda 3 during the holiday week last week, and also almost one whole day spent bringing Chloe and Gareth to the Hasbro toy warehouse sale(Clarissa had pre-school, and we were also going to get her birthday presents, so we didn't want her to see what we bought first). My goodness, we spent almost 3 hours queuing to get inside, and almost 2 hours queuing to pay for the toys. But they had great fun running through the toys, and this was one time in which I allowed them to buy almost whatever they picked out. Gareth could hardly believe his luck.

Anyway, apologies for no pictures of our exploits, and also of Charlotte. I'm writing this outside of home(I'm supposed to be doing my assignments), and my pictures are still locked in my phone, have not put them in the computer yet. May do so at the next post.

So that's that for now.

THE day

Well, it was a long day today.

Today was the day my wife was scheduled to deliver our fifth child. Her obstetrician was only willing to wait until today, at 39 weeks + 2 days of gestation, for natural labour to occur. My wife has mild gestational diabetes, and he did not want to take the risk of waiting too long. We kind of knew it was going to come to this day, because in all her previous pregnancies, she's never really had natural labour, they all had to be induced. So true enough, by this morning, my wife had no signs of natural labour, so we went to the delivery suite in the hospital to be admitted, right after the kiss goodbye:

Missed out on Chloe and Gareth because we forgot to get them to kiss the baby before bringing them to their school.

Anyway, we made our way to the hospital, where my wife got admitted into the delivery suite as planned. The obstetrician broke my wife's waterbag, and we then played the waiting game, to see if she would go into labour after that, because the waterbag breaking tends to stimulate the womb into labour.

As my wife and I suspected, she didn't really progress, so induction of labour commenced. This meant giving some hormones intravenously to stimulate the womb into contractions. Ideally we would have preferred natural labour, because induction is usually more painful.

We also had another decision to make: epidural or no epidural anaesthesia. In her first 2 pregnancies, my wife did not have any epidural, but they were really painful, so we thought we would give epidural a try in the 3rd pregnancy, since everyone who had tried it sang high praises about how wonderful epidural was. Unfortunately, my wife's epidural experience was bad. The dose was not enough, and she still experienced pain during the contractions, and she had bad side effects after the delivery. So we didn't have epidural for the 4th one. Now, we were deliberating whether to give it another try, because the 4th pregnancy was really painful and difficult. We then decided that if the nurses or the obstetrician were to ask if we wanted epidural, we would say yes, otherwise we would not ask for it ourselves. As it turned out, the only question that was close to it was, "So you want everything natural right?" That didn't quite count, so no epidural then.

It wasn't completely natural though, because she used nitrous oxide to help with the pain:

Good decision too, because as it turned out, the 2nd stage of labour was really quick this time round. My wife went into strong, regular contractions, and reached the point of wanting to push the baby out pretty soon. After the nurse did a check of the cervix, she muttered something and hurriedly rushed out, before returning to say she had informed our obstetrician to come. By the time he arrived, the head of the baby could be seen already, and just upon wearing the gloves, the baby popped out, at 4:08pm, weighing at 3.17kg. My wife did have quite bad pains, but at least it was really a lot quicker than the previous pregnancies.

The baby broke out into little bouts of cries, and was put to mother almost immediately, which was what we wanted, to strengthen the bond between mother and baby. After awhile, she was taken by the nurse to clean up and wrapped up nicely for presentation:

We went off to the room in the ward, while our baby girl was brought to the nursery for examination and monitoring. After my wife settled down, I went back home to the excited kids, and brought them over to see their brand new sibling.

My parents-in-law were also there(my mother-in-law was in fact taking care of the rest of the kids for us, and I brought her along with the kids), and my father-in-law prayed for Charlotte(the baby):

I like the way Chloe laid her hand on Charlotte during the prayer.

Thereafter, it was taking turns carrying the baby:

It was nice seeing the kids all getting excited about Charlotte without any sense of jealousy. Except maybe Gideon, who seemed to want to be as close to his mother after seeing her carrying Charlotte in her arms. Even so, he seemed to like her, and was willing to hug her when we asked him to:

So that's the first day in the life of Charlotte, our latest addition in the family. The days ahead seem daunting, with a lot more things that need to be done now that we have a newborn baby in the house. But hey, we'll go through them as a family together, and there will be so much more joy and happiness as we grow together.

The tortoise and the hare

I happened to come across a book titled "The tortoise and the hare" the other day. One of my kids' obviously, and left on the floor in typical fashion. As I negotiated my way past the book and the various other obstacles on the floor(no, I was not going to do their work and pick it up, they have got to learn, it's not about me being lazy, understand), I found myself recalling the story so familiar to most of us, being one of the favourite moral-containing stories for children.

We all know it right? The arrogant hare boasts of his speed to the calm and composed tortoise, who challenges the hare to a race. The hare, mocking the tortoise's presumptiousness(is that a word?), agrees without another thought.

The race got off as expected, with the hare racing away to a huge lead, while the tortoise, in his usual, slow, steady self, starts off at a snail's pace, one step after another. The hare is soon out of sight. The hare then thinks to himself, "I can take myself a little nap, and still wake up in time to finish the race ahead of the tortoise." So he settles himself on the grass and dozes off.

Meantime, the tortoise catches up with the hare, moving as slowly as when he started, but just as steadily. And he ambles past the hare and reaches the finishing line first. The hare, waking up too late, realises that he lost and hangs his head in shame.

And the moral of the story: slow and steady wins the race.

Is it, really?

Think about it. I know this is a story to encourage children to keep pushing on and never giving up to achieve what you want to achieve. But I submit that it's probably not the right story to push such a principle. Slow and steady wins the race? Really?

If the hare had done the logical thing and just finished the race before stopping for a rest, would the tortoise have stood a chance, no matter how slow and steady he was? Of course not. There was no way the tortoise was going to catch up. His winning the race was more to do with the hare stopping inexplicably for a rest than anything else. I would say the main character in this story is the hare, and the moral we can learn from this story stems from his attitude to the race: Don't be complacent, or you'll lose the race. Or, fast AND steady wins the race. Something like that. Okay, I'm not good at coming up with catchy moral phrases.

I think it's important to differentiate this for the kids, because it is certainly a wrong idea to think that as long as you are steady, no matter how slow you are, you'll still succeed.

What do you think?

First post of the year

My last post was quite awhile ago. It's been a hectic couple of months, especially the last 2-3 weeks. I will be filling in the details shortly, so look forward to it. Meantime, I'll provide a short summary.

Our family went on a holiday trip to Taiwan last December. We went together with my parents and my sister's family, making up a grand total of 12 people - 6 adults and 6 children. Half of this strength comes from my family alone. I will say this: My wife and I were expecting a tiring trip because of the children, and we both know that they would probably enjoy it more than us, but when we were actually in the trip itself, it was tougher than we expected. It's not like it was not fun and nice, even for us adults, but having to tend to the children almost continuously for the whole trip, tailoring the places we go to and the things we do to them, making sure the meals were suitable for them, that really takes a lot of energy. At the end of it, my wife and I resolve to not go for a long holiday again for the next 3-4 years at least. I wonder how long we will keep this promise. Will be sharing more on the trip including pictures soon.

Gareth started his life as a Primary One student this year. My wife and I had a lot of concern about whether he would adapt, could he concentrate in class, was he going to be a troublemaker, because he had shown himself thus far to be quite hyperactive and can go crazy easily. We were practically laying bets on which hour of the first day that the teacher would call us to complain about him. Well, thankfully that never happened, but his transition from pre-school happy-go-lucky guy to formal school-going student has not been completely smooth as well. But that would be another post.

My family fell sick about 2 weeks ago, first Clarissa, then my wife, then Chloe and Gareth, followed closely by Gideon. we're talking high fever, coughing, feeling like dying. My wife was admitted for 2 days, and I had to take a couple of days' emergency leave. I was the only one who didn't succumb. I thank God for that, but I did always tell my wife I was like Wolverine, healing factor and all. Maybe this time she will have believed me just a bit more.

Everybody only just recovered fully a few days ago, but at least it's over. Phew, taking care of 4 sick kids with the wife in the hospital.....don't try this at home, guys. 叔叔是有练过的。

Gideon was found to have amblyopia some time ago. For the layman, that's lazy eye. The eye has a squint, meaning that it tends to stray to the side. He has it in both eyes. If the condition does not resolve, he may need surgery to prevent the vision deteriorating. He's currently on eye patch treatment, to try and train the eyes. We are praying he'll avoid surgery.

Well, that's where we are at right now. As promised earlier, I will be filling in more oon the events mentioned above in subsequent posts. Right now, I need to go sleep.